Watch Mark compare the iPhone to his I'm-a-cheap-bastard-phone (which is actually a Nokia 3530, used by my nephew), with the help of "stevie wonder":

Hilarious! Thanks to Sasha for the heads-up

No YouTube in the office? Read on for some highlights:

"This is the phone you got free from T-Mobile four years ago, when Catherine Zeta-Jones was just another Welsh underage schoolgirl on Michael Douglas' creepy Christmas to-do list"

"The iPhone? It'll play all you MP3s, from all you favorite bands. The I'm-a-cheap-bastard-phone? It'll play only songs written before 1973. And they'll sound like a monkey playing a xylophone"

"The I'm-a-cheap-bastard-phone...available now from T-Mobile. Well, available now if you can get into a time machine, and go back in time, to a time when dinosaurs ruled the earth, before Michael Douglas had rubbed his leathery flesh all over Catherine Zeta-Jones"